As little a token as it is, hopes for your well-being and your children’s have been in my daily thoughts since I discovered the news. How I hope the new path you all take can create secure and solid comfort for everyone. Hugs to you.
So sorry to hear this. May God bless you and your family and grant you peace and strength during this difficult time. Big hugs to everyone. Keep up the good fight, Hugo!
I've never been married and thus never divorced, but I am going through a similarly torturous, repetitious, and often humiliating cycle: addiction and sobriety. I understand that it's also something you're familiar with.
While I won't assume to know the exact pain and emotion you're feeling right now, the experience of repeatedly starting and ending a marriage seems similar to that of being an addict and getting clean again; Hitting a rock bottom, picking yourself up from it, dusting yourself off, getting better, getting accustomed to being better, staying better, getting accustomed to staying better, then fucking it all up and starting the cycle over again. Each time you swear it's the last time you'll go through it, only to remember the exact moment you made that promise to yourself as you find yourself at the beginning of the cycle again.
I'm on the "getting accustomed to staying better" part at the moment, got nearly a year of clean time this round. But I'd be lying if I said I wasn't terrified of running out of road to drive down and that the all too familiar cliffside is a few mere meters away.
I don't let that fear distract or defeat me though because I've learned after fucking up so many times that this game is about small, incremental progress. Every time I have, I've learned something new that I apply in the next round, and that knowledge gets me just a little bit further than I made it previously. Eventually, I know I'll gain enough of that knowledge to get me to the finish line.
I don't mean to make your post about me, but I can sense you feel so beat down by going through a pain you're so familiar with, but yet doesn't get any easier when it comes up again. It just reminds me a lot of what i've been through. That little bit of progress is what we're meant to take from this cycle of pain, and that's what makes me able to get back up again each time I'm knocked down. I try to always remember that and hope you do too.
As an aside, I've followed your story and your writings for many years now and you are genuinely an inspiration to me. So if nothing else, know your journey has affected at least one life for the better.
As little a token as it is, hopes for your well-being and your children’s have been in my daily thoughts since I discovered the news. How I hope the new path you all take can create secure and solid comfort for everyone. Hugs to you.
So sorry to hear this. May God bless you and your family and grant you peace and strength during this difficult time. Big hugs to everyone. Keep up the good fight, Hugo!
I've never been married and thus never divorced, but I am going through a similarly torturous, repetitious, and often humiliating cycle: addiction and sobriety. I understand that it's also something you're familiar with.
While I won't assume to know the exact pain and emotion you're feeling right now, the experience of repeatedly starting and ending a marriage seems similar to that of being an addict and getting clean again; Hitting a rock bottom, picking yourself up from it, dusting yourself off, getting better, getting accustomed to being better, staying better, getting accustomed to staying better, then fucking it all up and starting the cycle over again. Each time you swear it's the last time you'll go through it, only to remember the exact moment you made that promise to yourself as you find yourself at the beginning of the cycle again.
I'm on the "getting accustomed to staying better" part at the moment, got nearly a year of clean time this round. But I'd be lying if I said I wasn't terrified of running out of road to drive down and that the all too familiar cliffside is a few mere meters away.
I don't let that fear distract or defeat me though because I've learned after fucking up so many times that this game is about small, incremental progress. Every time I have, I've learned something new that I apply in the next round, and that knowledge gets me just a little bit further than I made it previously. Eventually, I know I'll gain enough of that knowledge to get me to the finish line.
I don't mean to make your post about me, but I can sense you feel so beat down by going through a pain you're so familiar with, but yet doesn't get any easier when it comes up again. It just reminds me a lot of what i've been through. That little bit of progress is what we're meant to take from this cycle of pain, and that's what makes me able to get back up again each time I'm knocked down. I try to always remember that and hope you do too.
As an aside, I've followed your story and your writings for many years now and you are genuinely an inspiration to me. So if nothing else, know your journey has affected at least one life for the better.
My genuine best wishes in working through the worst of this to come to a better place for all involved.
I am so sorry, Hugo.
I’m sorry, Hugo.
I’m very sorry Hugo. Praying for peace for you.
I'm sorry things did not work out with you and Victoria. I wish you light and love, and healing energy.