Weekly Digest — May 30, 2021

Starting today, I’m planning to offer a Sunday recap of what happened on this site during the week — as well as other brief notes and updates.

First off, here’s what you might have missed:

For subscribers only, I wrote about my son’s circumcision and the limits of autonomy — as well as a post about whether there’s ever a “right” time to have children.

I also wrote snippets of memoir. I wrote about sleeping with the same woman exactly twice, 26 years apart — and about teaching two students whose bodies provoked and challenged me.

Cancel culture is deployed by folks across the political spectrum. I asked whether we’ve gotten addicted to the pleasure of dealing brutal consequences to those we don’t like. (Hint: yes.) And I wrote about my daughter’s gymnastics class, filled with Orthodox Jewish girls who cannot tumble if men are watching.

In Other News…

I’ve been on a diet since Easter Monday, and have lost some 25 pounds. I have 15 more to go to reach my goal. Dieting is fundamentally political, however — when we speak of our dissatisfaction with our own bodies, we may make it harder for others to practice body acceptance. Much of life is navigating the tension between accepting what is and pursuing what might still be, and everyone seems to navigate that tension differently. How do we talk about weight and exercise and beauty without upsetting those who are making an active effort to extricate themselves from society’s unreasonable standards? I don’t know that there is a right answer. I just know I want to fit into my old clothes again, and I want to live a long, vigorous, active life.

Goodbye, “Thank You Pay.”

Not long after the pandemic began, Trader Joe’s added an extra $2 an hour to every crew member’s pay. In January of this year, they added another $2. Two weeks ago, the company took the entire $4 away, citing the imminent end of the pandemic and the widespread availability of vaccines.

My base wage is $18.45 an hour; for the last several months, I’d been bringing home $22.45. Yesterday, I got my first paycheck without that $4 thank-you pay, and it was quite a shock. Ideally, I would have saved all that thank-you pay over the past 14 months. I live a bit too close to the margins for that, or perhaps I - like most of my fellow crew — lack that self-discipline.

$18.45 isn’t a bad wage, but it’s not quite a living wage when you’ve got rent to pay and kids to support and so on. Is this a plea for subscriptions? Possibly.

What I’m reading:

I’m almost finished with Three-Martini Afternoons at the Ritz: The Rebellion of Sylvia Plath & Anne Sexton, which mama sent me for my birthday. From my adolescence, I’ve always preferred Sexton to Plath, and this book has not changed that estimation — but it has given me a new appreciation for these two extraordinarily gifted poets who deserve to be remembered for much more than their short lives, and the way those lives ended.

What I’m listening to:

The English Concert has released an exceptional recording of one of Handel’s greatest operas, Rodelinda. I have a thing for counter-tenors, and the singing that Iestyn Davies offers on this new record is incandescent. Here’s an outtake:

What I’m excited about:

UCLA’s drive for another national championship in softball. Someday, I’ll bore you with the story of how three UCLA softball players took over the first class I ever taught as a TA in Westwood, and how they gave me a permanent love of the sport.